Friday, March 24, 2006

Good thing Bradley lost?

Fellow Mid-Majors Say Missouri Valley Suddenly Acting Like It’s Better Than Them

Friends and acquaintances of the Missouri Valley Conference say the conference has started acting as though it’s superior to them in the week since it received four bids to the NCAA Tournament and saw two of its teams qualify for the Sweet 16.

“Yeah, it’s like all of a sudden they think their s—t don’t stink,” said the Metro Atlantic Conference. “We called them up the other night to congratulate them on their success and they were all curt with us and said: ‘Uh, sorry. But I have to go. I’m supposed to go to the mall to hang out with the ACC.’”

The Metro Atlantic is not the only mid-major to notice the Missouri Valley’s attitude change.

“We always used to hang out together, commiserating on how tough it was to compete with the power conferences,” said the Mid Continent Conference. “And then I see them during the NCAA Tournament at a bar with the Big East and Big Ten, buying each other expensive import beers and thinking they’re the coolest cats in the place. And when I walked by them at the bar all I get from them is some lame nod like: ‘Hey, ‘sup man,’ as though they hardly even knew me. Apparently they thought their big, fancy friends the Big East and Big Ten wouldn’t think they were cool if they were friends with the lowly Mid Continent Conference. Whatever. Screw them. We didn’t forget where we came from when Valparaiso made a run a few years ago. But then we’re not phonies.”

Despite the claims of its fellow mid-majors, the Missouri Valley Conference says it hasn’t forgotten where it came from.

“I don’t think we’re really acting all that different. I think it might just be that the other mid-majors are jealous of the attention we’ve been getting, that’s all,” said the MVC. “But, you know, conferences like us don’t get a lot of opportunities to be mentioned with the big boys. This might be our only shot to make the jump from mid-major status to major status. If that means changing our appearances a bit and hanging out with the ACC and Big East, so be it. We wouldn’t begrudge the other mid-majors doing it if they were in our shoes. And, to be honest, if they would try a little harder like we did, the big conferences might want to hang out with them, too.”

No matter the reasons for the MVC’s change in behavior, its fellow mid-majors will be rooting against it come this weekend.

“We’re all going to get together over at the MAC’s place to watch them lose,” said the Northeast Conference. “It will be good for them to get put back in their place by getting whooped up on by the big conferences. And, if they apologize to us and come back hat in hand, we’ll take them back into our lowly, pathetic ranks where they belong.”

SportsPickle.com

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